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Retumba en tus adentros

Mamay, mantay, Pachamama ¿Para qué es que es el dolor? Pachamama... ay mantay! Sientes mi corazón tum tum, tum tum.. ¡Ayayay! Retumba en tus adentros Se viene fuerte, dolor de parto ¡Ayayay! color, encanto... Hay de vida por montón hay de todo alrededor ¿Qué hago aquí entonces yo?  Mamay, dime, por favor... QUE SI LA FLOR VINO A FLORECER Y LA MADRE A MATERNAR EL AGUA FLUYE PARA DAR Y TÚ NOS OYES LLORAR- QUIENES ESTAMOS ACÁ  AHORA QUÉ VA A PASAR... ¿Cómo es esto, y para qué? Todo esto de ser... ¡Ay, Madre! Todo esto de servir y aguantar sin recibir Mamay, mantay, Pachamama ¿Qué hago con este dolor? ¿Cómo beso a tus niños que no ...ay mantay, que no cantan ya hoy? Ayayay... Retumba en tus adentros... QUE SI EL AMOR VINO A REDIMIR Y EL AVE A VOLAR LA TIERRA BROTA PARA DAR Y TÚ NOS OYES ACLAMAR- QUIENES ESTAMOS ACÁ AHORA QUÉ MÁS VENDRÁ... Madre, yo veo... Madre, yo siento... Madre, yo sueño... Madre, pero no entiendo... Padre, yo anhelo... Padre, yo protejo... Padre, yo me esfuerz...
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#MeToo Story: My 3-year-old's account (Yes, her too) - Part 1 /2

It's been about three years since it all happened. She is over 6 and a half years-old now and I'm yet to feel ready to share this... She was 3 back then. It has been on my mind for a while, and I know I'm never going to feel truly "ready", but I do feel like I must, because this is our story , as real and raw as it can be, but it is also about something much bigger than just us. Which I hope she'll understand in the future. March 2021 is when I first discovered the Sacred Valley of Incas' "spiritual and plant medicine community" . I am Peruvian, but I come from a different region of the country. I moved here driven by the dream of a calmer and more natural way of living, and a multicultural community to raise my daughter into. And, although I was disappointed when I didn't find more Peruvians in the circle, I couldn't say I was really surprised, since it is a known fact that New Age knowledge, and practices such as Yoga and meditation are...
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Un cuento de terror bajo el sol de los Andes

Les contaré un cuento... Parecerá de terror, pero es la vida real, y más cerca de lo que creen: Hace 3 años, a poco de mudarme al Valle Sagrado (Cusco, Perú), conocí a un joven extranjero (pakistani-canadiense) que al principio creí que era mi amigo, un sensible buscador de la verdad como yo... Un día, en una de las tantas ceremonias de Ayahuasca a las que él iba, casi semanalmente por su fuerte convicción de convertirse en chamán, tuvo unas visiones. Siempre tenía visiones, pues es parte de "la experiencia" de las plantas psicodélicas pero, en esta ocasión específica, dice que me alucinó A MÍ cometiendo una serie de actos sexuales aberrantes, supuestamente actuando en un extraño complot (o "ritual") con un conocido que teníamos en común - y peruano como yo- que en aquel entonces era el novio de una amiga. Él dice que creyó que las visiones eran reales... Y no sólo creyó eso, sino que creyó que la "madre Ayahuasca" le había revelado, en varias ocasiones, ...
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Unmemoried [POEM]

From one second to the next my mind and memory are erased All gone, beyond reach What is it... What was it? I know I know it, it's my own knowledge it's there in storage But I can't keep hold of it. [18/5/2023 On Mothers' "Baby Brain"]
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Words.

Words words wroso dowrs weosw worusw Words Words words wrods wordsss There's a lot of those in my head Popping, swimming, squirming faster that I can bear Or that I can write Escaping, firing, wiring I try to catch them I would like to share them But how could I when I barely understand them I wanna cry. They are a lot but they also run out.
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Five years of being her "Mamita"

Almost exactly five years ago (+ 2 days 😁) Kalyani Alba, my first-born daughter, was delivered into this world; some would say I "officially became a mother". 😄 💖 🌈👶🏻 ➡️ 👧🏻  It was a hectic afternoon and a hectic couple of days after, until we came home from the hospital and I've been high in love ever since. Being in postpartum again right now brings me back so much! I was terrified I wasn't ready to be a mother, of the circumstances of doing it by myself as a single parent, and basically of-everything-and-all-at-once, like it tends to happen when one is processing post-partum depression plus complex ptsd, as I have, both times... I got shocked by how much I love her. I didn't know that with birthing her, I'd be birthing a new "biggest fear" for life, and that is that anything "bad" would happen to her. My mom answered saying "Welcome to motherhood. That feeling doesn't ever go away"... O.O WHAT did I get myself into?...
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Careful what you wish for!

I wanted endless weekend I desired for a pause I dreamed of starting over with no meetings and no job I just wanted to feel free of all demands and expectation Longed to be just like a teen in a place to explore creative expression Now I'm stuck in quarantine, Wasn't careful what I wished for With a curfew at eighteen, this is not what I prepared for I wanted a retreat in India I dreamed of going to Tibet I desired for more silence some more nature, love and peace I just wanted to sit quiet in a state of contemplation Didn't know what I would miss but now I got my isolation And I see all comes at best timing, look how fate can be so sharp Right when I was whining I had no time to make my art I didn't want to deal with people I didn't like how it all worked I also wished I could do things over 'Cause I wanted my family to bond Felt I was trying to fuction while still figuring my life through Knew I was tired of old systems and I...
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